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Hilary Jacobs Hendel | The Change Triangle
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When You Make a Mistake, What Happens Next?
When you make a mistake do you pick yourself up or beat yourself up?
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Oct 7, 20242 min read

What Does Connection Feel Like?
Being connected feels good and right. But have you ever asked yourself, "What does connection feels like?"
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Jun 7, 20244 min read


Loosening the Grip of Perfectionism (Part 1)
Perfectionism gives us the illusion of control in the midst of emotions that feel out of control, especially when we’re young.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Dec 10, 20235 min read


Defining & Finding Your Authentic Self
Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom. - Aristotle Lillian, a patient of mine, didn’t know who she truly was. She lacked a...
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Oct 7, 20236 min read

Why You Just Can't “Get Over It”
For many of us, our early experiences with emotions involved us being told to "get over it" in one way or another.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Jul 12, 20232 min read


Detaching with Love and Openheartedness
My teenagers' dark and surly moods, my husband's anxiety, my mother's rare show of displeasure, and my father's anger and frugality, all...
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Feb 8, 20234 min read

3 Tips to Stay More Present in the Present
Resisting the mind’s pull toward future worries or past wounds takes practice.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Nov 8, 20223 min read


“He’s an Idiot!” Considering the Judgments We All Make
"He's an idiot," my father would snap when someone didn't do something the way he wanted. It didn't bother me then. But now I realize my...
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
May 9, 20224 min read


Two Powerful Techniques to Lower Anxiety
Two effective techniques to decrease anxiety based on accelerated experiential dynamic psychotherapy (AEDP) and the Change Triangle® tool.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Nov 7, 20213 min read

5 Crucial Qualities to Seek in a Life Partner
Dating tips for finding emotional intimacy and connection
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Oct 10, 20217 min read


From Confusion to Clarity
(The personal reflections on confusion quoted throughout this article were generously shared by "Michele." Thank you, Michele.) "I often...
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
May 7, 20215 min read


The Key to Inner Balance
For inner equilibrium and harmony, we have to balance our use and expenditure of energy.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Sep 10, 20205 min read


Rupture & Repair Part 1:Connection, Disconnection, & Emotional Communication in Infancy
Why do some children become sad, withdrawn, insecure, or angry, whereas others become happy, curious, affectionate, and self-confident?
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Mar 9, 20207 min read


5 Tips to Build Emotional Resilience When the Holidays Bring Distress
It's not unusual for the holidays to bring up anxiety. But, a little emotion education and a few tips go a long way to getting through.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Dec 6, 20194 min read


Getting to Know Your Three Brains: Part 5 Challenges to Becoming Aware
Many of us are afraid, uncomfortable, or reluctant to know our internal world. Here are some of the reasons:
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Aug 14, 20183 min read


What's in a Moment?
But we can shift our mind to be in the present moment. And when we do, we wake up a visceral part of us. I am alive. I am here.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Apr 13, 20175 min read


Why Am I Uncomfortable Getting Close To People?
Many of us as children or adolescents shared our feelings with the “wrong” person - someone whose response was to humiliate or reject us.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Nov 16, 20163 min read


The Best Way to Discover Something New About You!
Slowing down will allow you to notice more about your emotional world. Want to experiment?
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Oct 10, 20152 min read
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